The funny thing about my
disease is I never get to know when and what memory is getting lost. Two days
ago, I received a letter from Singapore. However, as I opened the envelope and
read the letter, I realized that it is not an ordinary one! It is a special message,
a message with a subtle touch of LOVE! However, I was completely unable to
recall anything associated with it or its sender. Let me first note down the
contents of the letter…
My Dear Pravin
I hope you are fondly missing the time we
have spent together, just as I am missing it.
I must say that those ten days were the
best days of my life. It was a time when I experienced true love! It was a time
I experienced innocence in the eyes of a man… that is you! It was a time when I
discovered my true self. I got a new name from you; a name I still cherish…
Even though we had to part, and I had to
travel far away, I still remember the promise we made to each other. I am
writing this letter to you to say that I will keep my word! I shall be waiting
for you on the 25th of December, at the place we decided to meet again
and be united forever. Yes, as you poetically mentioned… it is where The Blue Orchid
Blooms!
Always Yours,
Kannika Amudee
After reading the
letter, I sat with a blank canvas in my mind, without any memories of Kannika
or any incidences related to her. Throughout the night I kept wondering and
struggling to recall something that would help me find the answers to so many
questions that crowded my mind. The letter is still special to me, as it is the
only source that can remind me about PASSION and LOVE in my life! I now know
that by 25th December, my disease will erase all my memories. This
letter and any recollection of Kannika is like an anchor that would anchor me
back to my emotional and romantic self!
I tried to go through my
belonging, in search of some clue. I asked aunt Padma whether she ever heard
about the name Kannika. However, nothing fruitful happened. I felt something
strange inside, a sort of ache in my heart, but remained helpless in discovering
anything.
Then, something happened
last night!
Dreams are the true windows of the
subconscious mind and through this magical window, came a gust of promising
reminiscence of answers I was frantically seeking. In my dream, last night, a
pair of beautiful blue eyes emerged! I could see the love in them. I saw a pair
of beautiful lips, flaunting a deeply innocent smile; I heard the intoxicating sound
of her laughter; I saw her beautiful dark hair, silkily waving in the wind. I
could see her beautiful, thin long fingers, gesturing me to come near her!
Like the moving pages of a journal, I
could see myself sitting with her, Kannika, in the garden of Delhi University,
and pouring my heart out to her. I could not see her complete face, but the
fragments that appeared in my vision, were enough to help me identify that it
was indeed her.
Yes, I remembered that she came to Delhi,
along with a group of researchers from Singapore and we met during a seminar. She was from a remote village near Phuket in
Thailand, but had to travel across the world for her research study, as part of
her scholarship program. It was love at first sight for both of us and within
the ten days, we understood that we were made for each other. I lost my heart
in the depths of her innocent blue eyes and gave her a special name. I called
her Blue Orchid… the heavenly flower of Thailand!
My sleep broke and my
dream got interrupted. I could not recall anything further. Even though the
dream brought back some very vital information… her face still remained a haze!
The name “Phuket” rang in my ears and I determined myself that I must go there.
I am convinced that even if her face is still a blur, her pure love would unite
me with her. Even though the name of the remote village, in Thailand, is obscured
from my active memory, I am sure when I reach Phuket I would be able to locate
it and find my beloved.
Kannika’s letter and my
last night’s recollections tell me that are our bond is still strong and
defines an arterial lifeline within me. Let me note down here, that whatever
happens, on December 25th 2004 I shall go to Thailand, to Phuket and
to the village where my beloved Kannika, my Blue
Orchid Blooms!
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