Friendship brought a new meaning to my life today… kudos to the nostalgia of CIRCUS! Today I must write this down as part of my journal so that this emotion remains engraved in my memory forever! Not all stories are meant to extract a learning and a sense of knowledge and wisdom, some are simply meant for enjoying the beauty of emotions that keep us alive irrespective of the fact that we are humans or animals.
Every year, it is a customary habit of mine to visit our old house in Dehradun. Aunt Padma and I did the same this year too and visited our little old fashioned English-styled bungalow during the winters. Amid the beauty of Mother Nature, there are many memories about this place that are soaked deep into my heart. My childhood had shaped here and I am what I am perhaps by the magic touch of this serene country. My father, my Baba, my hero taught me many things and this was one shrine where I received his companionship. Almost adjacent to the “Gandhi Park” and a few hundred meters away from the “Clock Tower” is the sprawling Parade Ground. My fondest memories of this place, as a child, are of the Circus! Baba used to take me and I used to thoroughly enjoy the performances! Not only were the human performances, but also the acts by the exotic animals like the leopards, monkeys and hippopotamus, were my favorite.
Gone are the days of the grandeur of the Circus and many of them had suffered from the demons they bred and the government had aptly banned the cruelty of animals and the repulsive lifestyle meted out to the poor creatures. However, to the child within me, and maybe in many others like me, the charm of Circus vanished when the animal performances were curtailed. I don’t want to justify any brutality, it’s just a feel which a child who had grown up the in last millennium perhaps misses and feels nostalgic about.
Bulakiprasad had been the caretaker of our bungalow for perhaps the last twenty-five years. My father employed him and he still lives in the bungalow and takes care of it. He is like family and aunt Padma and I have a special emotional attachment with him. Even though I don’t have much memories associated with him, maybe because I went away from Dehradun even before such a bonding could develop, I still remember that every Sunday Bulakiprasad used to take a leave from work. Maybe Baba knew the reason, but I never bothered to ask.
This year during our visit, on a Sunday morning, as aunt Padma was making breakfast for us, Bulakiprasad came and said, “Amma, I leaving from the day… I shall be back by the evening.”
I wondered what Bulakiprasad did during the Sundays! He didn’t have any family and lived alone in the outhouse of our bungalow, however he still takes his customary day-off every Sunday. I felt inquisitive but didn’t say anything. After finishing a sumptuous breakfast, I told aunt Padma, “I am going out for a stroll. Let me absorb as much old memories as I can!”
I put on a jacket and walked out. The thoughts of Bulakiprasad vanished completely from my mind. I walked down the memory lanes and arrived at the gates of Zoo! The name “ZOO” created a childlike cheer in my heart, and in that winter morning, I purchased a ticket and went inside. The impulsive act was not futile and I enjoyed my trip as I went inside. Time flew by and I kept roaming around with a refreshed mind. Finally, I arrived at a corner which hosted rescued wild animals and their offsprings. Near a railing that housed the exotic and huge mountain tiger I saw him… Bulakiprasad! I write this in this manner because there was something in the expression of his face, something in the tears of his eyes that made me feel a pang in my heart. I was confused and I wanted to know.
I approached him and patting on his shoulder, said, “Bulakiprasad, what are you doing here? Why are you crying?”
Bulakiprasad as initially startled to see me and felt awkward. He quickly wiped off his tears and replied, “Nothing sir!”
I urged, “Bulakiprasad… maybe we don’t bond much, but I consider you my family, just like Baba used to. Every Sunday you take a leave from the bungalow and vanish for the whole day. Now, today I see you here in front of this cage and that huge Tiger! What is it? Tell me, we can share a few emotions.”
We sat down on a concrete seat and Bulakiprasad replied, “Pravin Baba… every Sunday I don’t vanish. Every Sunday I come here to meet my family!”
I felt weird and stared at him while Bulakiprasad continued, “Before my elder brother approached your father to make me the caretaker of the bungalow, I used to be a performer at the Great Exotic Circus of Dehradun! My buddy my daughter was the famous tigress Sheena! I got her when she was a few weeks old and I grew her up like my own child! I never married, she was my companion! With the Great Exotic Circus, Sheena and I traveled many places and gave many famous performances! I was a star ringmaster and Sheena was my partner! She grew up to be a huge tigress and a beauty to look at! My daughter!”
My heart was feeling a pain while Bulakiprasad spoke, “When the owner of the company died, the Circus went out of business and donated Sheena to this zoo, here in this segment! I felt a pain that was beyond comprehension. Parting with my own daughter was like death! However, I had to do it. I left my job at the circus and started to work as the caretaker of your father’s bungalow. He, your father, knew my pain and made arrangements with the zoo authorities so that I could visit here, every Sunday, free of cost, and meet Sheena! That is something which I had been doing for the last twenty-five years! It completes my family!”
I wiped off the tears from my eyes and asked while looking at a huge tiger that was roaming inside, “So, is that Sheena?”
Bulakiprasad smiled and replied, “No Pravin Baba, Sheena died at the age of nineteen. That is the maximum age a tiger survives. This is Shahenshah, the son of Sheena! He knows me, he loves me. Even though I am not allowed to touch him, I meet him every Sunday and I can see the love in his eyes!”
I don’t know whether I saw the touch of love in the eyes of the tiger that morning, however the belief in the heart of the old man, Bulakiprasad, and the bonding he shared with the lineage of his daughter Sheena, was something which created ripples of turmoil in my heart.
I touched his hands and told Bulakiprasad, “Sheena was your daughter and we are your family. I am glad you share this beautiful story of friendship with me. Friendship is not just a bonding between two human beings, it is a pure love that can be beyond the fences of spoken language… you prove it that friendship can be so beautiful between a wild tigress and a human being too!”
I came back with a heart full of happiness and as I write this journal, I wonder how many such people exist who truly loved their Sheena and still feel the pangs of separation from them. I don’t want to argue, I don’t want to justify, I just feel that friendship wrote a new meaning in my soul. The pure love of Bulakiprasad and his tigress daughter Sheena is an example of unconditional love that keeps us alive!
